Steve from England

So, I have this urge to go climbing hills looking for lonely goatherds, what's the problem with that I ask myself? OK, there is this chance I will be too knackered to do anything with him when I locate him but it's a nice thought all the same! I can assure you this has nothing to do with lederhosen, I would remove that very quickly! OK, cut scene to walking across the desert, scarf over mouth when beautiful boy is seen wandering naked across the peaks ... stuff the camel and I don't care if it gets the hump, I'm off to the rescue, someone needs to protect that young man from the sand and wash him in clear water getting to all those hard to reach places ... Meanwhile, back on the space station with young Bennett, the chief engineer fresh out of design school. Today will be an experimentation on the theory of zero gravity and its effect on the body during intercourse. I know, in the job spec this called for a woman but Bennett seemed ever so keen and the experiement need...

So, I have this urge to go climbing hills looking for lonely goatherds, what's the problem with that I ask myself? OK, there is this chance I will be too knackered to do anything with him when I locate him but it's a nice thought all the same! I can assure you this has nothing to do with lederhosen, I would remove that very quickly! OK, cut scene to walking across the desert, scarf over mouth when beautiful boy is seen wandering naked across the peaks ... stuff the camel and I don't care if it gets the hump, I'm off to the rescue, someone needs to protect that young man from the sand and wash him in clear water getting to all those hard to reach places ... Meanwhile, back on the space station with young Bennett, the chief engineer fresh out of design school. Today will be an experimentation on the theory of zero gravity and its effect on the body during intercourse. I know, in the job spec this called for a woman but Bennett seemed ever so keen and the experiement need...

Enough said really :-( Off to bed with me

Enough said really :-( Off to bed with me

The PC is now fully restored and running fast, didn’t take as long as I feared it would and relatively few problems. The main issue is I still can’t find any way of saving my email settings so I am constantly forgetting them. I have them written down but I then have to enter each in manually and it is a right pain when there are a dozen of them. My friend from school arrived here on Wednesday with the intent to stay until Thursday. It’s difficult to describe Paul politely but suffice to say, I am going to try! He is just a few months my senior yet acts at least 20+ years more than that. His age is an excuse not to do anything in life, strangely, he has always had an excuse not to do anything, and his ancient being (apparently) is just one of the many excuses he has. I swear I shall swing for him if he tries to bundle me in his exclusive ‘too old to change now’ club. He suffers panic attacks believing alcohol offers a far better solution that the doctor could so seeking the former on a ...

The PC is now fully restored and running fast, didn’t take as long as I feared it would and relatively few problems. The main issue is I still can’t find any way of saving my email settings so I am constantly forgetting them. I have them written down but I then have to enter each in manually and it is a right pain when there are a dozen of them. My friend from school arrived here on Wednesday with the intent to stay until Thursday. It’s difficult to describe Paul politely but suffice to say, I am going to try! He is just a few months my senior yet acts at least 20+ years more than that. His age is an excuse not to do anything in life, strangely, he has always had an excuse not to do anything, and his ancient being (apparently) is just one of the many excuses he has. I swear I shall swing for him if he tries to bundle me in his exclusive ‘too old to change now’ club. He suffers panic attacks believing alcohol offers a far better solution that the doctor could so seeking the former on a ...

Oh, it's OK, no one has died! No, I am finally doing a rebuild on my main PC which means I have to use the laptop which I don't like doing for long though I have no idea, it is quite a nice keyboard! Martyn having his graphics card trouble finally encouraged me to get a new graphics card for my PC but not, it seems, to see what interface I had so now I have the wrong graphics card and PC World do not like giving refunds when there is nothing wrong with a product but only if there is a defect and it was entirely my own fault after all, it does say 'PCI Express' in huge great letters on the box and had I had any idea that such a slot existed I would have known not to get one as I don't have a compatible motherboard. So, off to PC World tomorrow, wish me luck! My PC is all ready for the rebuild subject to the new graphics card, hard drives swapped etc so it should take no more than 3-4 hours to complete. I bought something for someone earlier :-) I nearly have my full ...

Oh, it's OK, no one has died! No, I am finally doing a rebuild on my main PC which means I have to use the laptop which I don't like doing for long though I have no idea, it is quite a nice keyboard! Martyn having his graphics card trouble finally encouraged me to get a new graphics card for my PC but not, it seems, to see what interface I had so now I have the wrong graphics card and PC World do not like giving refunds when there is nothing wrong with a product but only if there is a defect and it was entirely my own fault after all, it does say 'PCI Express' in huge great letters on the box and had I had any idea that such a slot existed I would have known not to get one as I don't have a compatible motherboard. So, off to PC World tomorrow, wish me luck! My PC is all ready for the rebuild subject to the new graphics card, hard drives swapped etc so it should take no more than 3-4 hours to complete. I bought something for someone earlier :-) I nearly have my full ...

Saying I am cured is taking things a little far but very nearly true. I am sort of eating normally. I can't say I am because 'normally' before I got ill meant a whole lot more food than it does now. Looking in the mirror I was convinced I had not lost weight yet went to the gym earlier and fully dressed carrying my ipod I was 9st 3lbs which is considerably less than I would have thought I was. Matt has been telling me how some fat lesbian at college has been making him really angry today insisting that he has had 'man flu', in other words, a cold. I think I would have replied that actually, I was nearly better but that she was still an ugly fat lesbian! Speaking of the gym, yes I did, up there somewhere ... I did more than I thought I would today. On the cycle thingy and burnt off 100 calories which is pathetic for what I would normally do but 'normally' I would not be on the cycle thingy for 15 minutes. I was a little shocked how low I had to go wit...

Saying I am cured is taking things a little far but very nearly true. I am sort of eating normally. I can't say I am because 'normally' before I got ill meant a whole lot more food than it does now. Looking in the mirror I was convinced I had not lost weight yet went to the gym earlier and fully dressed carrying my ipod I was 9st 3lbs which is considerably less than I would have thought I was. Matt has been telling me how some fat lesbian at college has been making him really angry today insisting that he has had 'man flu', in other words, a cold. I think I would have replied that actually, I was nearly better but that she was still an ugly fat lesbian! Speaking of the gym, yes I did, up there somewhere ... I did more than I thought I would today. On the cycle thingy and burnt off 100 calories which is pathetic for what I would normally do but 'normally' I would not be on the cycle thingy for 15 minutes. I was a little shocked how low I had to go wit...

Today has been a much better day for me. No where near as much pain and I have managed to eat a little. I actually feel quite stuffed on what was no more than an average watery lunch! My comments the other day about Matt and DJ were wrong, silly dad. Matt actually feels worse and Daisy's ear has still not stopped leaking and is very painful for her. I had both of them back at the docs today. DJ has drops for her ear and Matt another course of penicilin but told that if he is not improved in a couple of days to go back and get a blood test in case it may be glandular fever. DJ had a swab done though I am not sure what that will prove. Tomorrow, which will be today by now I should think, I have a meeting with the local MP about social services. I won't be saying anything, I can't. My advocate Sue will do all the chatting and I have prepared her some notes to make it a lot easier. Got a cheque for £50 from AutoGlass earlier by way of a final settlement of my dispute with them...

Today has been a much better day for me. No where near as much pain and I have managed to eat a little. I actually feel quite stuffed on what was no more than an average watery lunch! My comments the other day about Matt and DJ were wrong, silly dad. Matt actually feels worse and Daisy's ear has still not stopped leaking and is very painful for her. I had both of them back at the docs today. DJ has drops for her ear and Matt another course of penicilin but told that if he is not improved in a couple of days to go back and get a blood test in case it may be glandular fever. DJ had a swab done though I am not sure what that will prove. Tomorrow, which will be today by now I should think, I have a meeting with the local MP about social services. I won't be saying anything, I can't. My advocate Sue will do all the chatting and I have prepared her some notes to make it a lot easier. Got a cheque for £50 from AutoGlass earlier by way of a final settlement of my dispute with them...

Matt is slightly improved as is Daisy. I am now on antibiotics but they only started yesterday. It will be a few days before they start doing anything. I still can't talk, can't eat and sleeping is horrible, loads of being awake in pain and nightmares when I do sleep waking up in pain. Things could be better

Matt is slightly improved as is Daisy. I am now on antibiotics but they only started yesterday. It will be a few days before they start doing anything. I still can't talk, can't eat and sleeping is horrible, loads of being awake in pain and nightmares when I do sleep waking up in pain. Things could be better

Daisy has an ear infection, Matt has tonsilitis and I have a viral infection ... that means, they get antibiotics and I am sent home and told to rest and see how I am in three days ... so much for doctors

Daisy has an ear infection, Matt has tonsilitis and I have a viral infection ... that means, they get antibiotics and I am sent home and told to rest and see how I am in three days ... so much for doctors

Well, no voice, such that my condition currently is, means no meeting. This did not stop me picking up the phone and dialing the number to apologise for me not being there. I was lucky, brain engaged before I pressed the green button! My PDA is saving on the paper, I am writing what I need to say on there. I do need to have an emergency appointment with the doctor as clearly my optimism on this bug was unfounded and it isn't going anywhere. I shall make myself a sign and place it around my neck I think but I know they will start asking all sorts of stupid questions and me communicating I have lost my voice won't stop them! Matt still isn't OK either so I am hoping he's off college tomorrow and can call them for the pair of us. Yes, I know, I was told I should have seen the doctor a few days ago, I shall do as I am told next time, promise.

Well, no voice, such that my condition currently is, means no meeting. This did not stop me picking up the phone and dialing the number to apologise for me not being there. I was lucky, brain engaged before I pressed the green button! My PDA is saving on the paper, I am writing what I need to say on there. I do need to have an emergency appointment with the doctor as clearly my optimism on this bug was unfounded and it isn't going anywhere. I shall make myself a sign and place it around my neck I think but I know they will start asking all sorts of stupid questions and me communicating I have lost my voice won't stop them! Matt still isn't OK either so I am hoping he's off college tomorrow and can call them for the pair of us. Yes, I know, I was told I should have seen the doctor a few days ago, I shall do as I am told next time, promise.

… and back and insides and outsides. Yep, I have the cold still but it is only a cold so I am not dyeing any quicker than I should do with it as far as I am aware. Matt seems to have something equally nasty too – excuse me whilst I just clean something off the screen – Last night was a much better night. Not that I went to bed until about 2 this morning but at least I kind of slept with regular waking moments but nothing extreme. Tilly has been all protective like animals can get. Worked out I wasn’t right and not wanted to leave me alone. On the plus side, I know that were I working I would have been at work today, they would have had to send me home and I doubt I would have been entirely functional but I am capable, sort of! Had to show Matt the brutal reality of car insurance earlier by doing a quote for a really cheap and small car which came out just short of £3000, the car he wanted came out at £3700 and this is only 3rd party cover! Bless him, he seems so dejected but I can’t ch...

… and back and insides and outsides. Yep, I have the cold still but it is only a cold so I am not dyeing any quicker than I should do with it as far as I am aware. Matt seems to have something equally nasty too – excuse me whilst I just clean something off the screen – Last night was a much better night. Not that I went to bed until about 2 this morning but at least I kind of slept with regular waking moments but nothing extreme. Tilly has been all protective like animals can get. Worked out I wasn’t right and not wanted to leave me alone. On the plus side, I know that were I working I would have been at work today, they would have had to send me home and I doubt I would have been entirely functional but I am capable, sort of! Had to show Matt the brutal reality of car insurance earlier by doing a quote for a really cheap and small car which came out just short of £3000, the car he wanted came out at £3700 and this is only 3rd party cover! Bless him, he seems so dejected but I can’t ch...

I got about 4 hours sleep, probably scared the life out of a few friends, maybe upset one or two and for that I apologise. In relation to health I still feel crap but it is a bad cold mixed up with being really tired which only 4 hours sleep will do for a person. Apart from that I feel quite upbeat. Writing what I did last night clearly helped even if I am not sure you, the reader, needed to read it. Particular apologies to Martyn who got more messages than most and, just as Tony would have done, wisely decided not to reply but I am sure he'd have found it so much easier just to write back 'sod off'. Trying to drink my first coffee of the day, taken the best part of an hour so far as I made it then walked into the office direct from getting up and noticed a text from Matt saying how he was running really late, had missed his bus because Zoey would not cooperate and only have 25 minutes to get to the other side of town for an 'A' level exam. I left straight away but...

I got about 4 hours sleep, probably scared the life out of a few friends, maybe upset one or two and for that I apologise. In relation to health I still feel crap but it is a bad cold mixed up with being really tired which only 4 hours sleep will do for a person. Apart from that I feel quite upbeat. Writing what I did last night clearly helped even if I am not sure you, the reader, needed to read it. Particular apologies to Martyn who got more messages than most and, just as Tony would have done, wisely decided not to reply but I am sure he'd have found it so much easier just to write back 'sod off'. Trying to drink my first coffee of the day, taken the best part of an hour so far as I made it then walked into the office direct from getting up and noticed a text from Matt saying how he was running really late, had missed his bus because Zoey would not cooperate and only have 25 minutes to get to the other side of town for an 'A' level exam. I left straight away but...

Late yesterday morning I started to get a little tickle of a cough, nothing else, just that, nothing to worry about. The previous night, that’s be Sunday, Matt did me some Gin & Tonics but it was not until my head started really spinning I realised how strong they were, I went from being mildly tipsy to really rather pissed. Needless to say, I didn’t feel too clever when I woke up at 8:00 on Monday morning. I also had not gone to bed until something like 3am so too much booze and not enough sleep. I took myself off to Tesco for lunch, I had no idea why, I didn’t need to go to Tesco but there I was and I was aware I was not thinking rationally. Later on in the day I visited the GUM clinic, my throat started to tickle again so I needed some water. Had all my checks, two weeks to wait for the result. By 9pm I had made my mind up that a bedtime prior to midnight was on the cards and so I went upstairs at 11 but realised quickly I was feeling way worse than just tired. I couldn’t get wa...

Late yesterday morning I started to get a little tickle of a cough, nothing else, just that, nothing to worry about. The previous night, that’s be Sunday, Matt did me some Gin & Tonics but it was not until my head started really spinning I realised how strong they were, I went from being mildly tipsy to really rather pissed. Needless to say, I didn’t feel too clever when I woke up at 8:00 on Monday morning. I also had not gone to bed until something like 3am so too much booze and not enough sleep. I took myself off to Tesco for lunch, I had no idea why, I didn’t need to go to Tesco but there I was and I was aware I was not thinking rationally. Later on in the day I visited the GUM clinic, my throat started to tickle again so I needed some water. Had all my checks, two weeks to wait for the result. By 9pm I had made my mind up that a bedtime prior to midnight was on the cards and so I went upstairs at 11 but realised quickly I was feeling way worse than just tired. I couldn’t get wa...

Does anyone want around 40= totally crap DVD not one of which I have had any success with? If they allow me to write to them hardly any drive will read it afterwards ... memo to self : Don't buy cheap crap from PC World. The outside light is still inside, it has got really cold again with snow and ice and I am buggered if I am going outside to sort it out in this! I am sick of being fat yet have managed to find an excuse every day not to go to the pool or the gym, I should be ashamed of myself ... and I am. This pain I am getting, it's not very nice but there are some advantages, OK, just the one I have discovered so far. When I got to bed I have really cold feet but I also have inflamed ankles so, if I rest my feet on my ankles (not at the same time silly) then my feet get warmed up and the pain eases off a little, a good balance. It hurts too much to put my feet on my knees where the main pain is so if someone with cold feet would like some knees to use, here I am. Why do I ...

Does anyone want around 40= totally crap DVD not one of which I have had any success with? If they allow me to write to them hardly any drive will read it afterwards ... memo to self : Don't buy cheap crap from PC World. The outside light is still inside, it has got really cold again with snow and ice and I am buggered if I am going outside to sort it out in this! I am sick of being fat yet have managed to find an excuse every day not to go to the pool or the gym, I should be ashamed of myself ... and I am. This pain I am getting, it's not very nice but there are some advantages, OK, just the one I have discovered so far. When I got to bed I have really cold feet but I also have inflamed ankles so, if I rest my feet on my ankles (not at the same time silly) then my feet get warmed up and the pain eases off a little, a good balance. It hurts too much to put my feet on my knees where the main pain is so if someone with cold feet would like some knees to use, here I am. Why do I ...

No, not the drug, the RAM for my PC arrived and I have noticed a speed increase. I have also had a blue screen of death again and it is from the nvidea graphics card. Checked Google and it is a well known problem, loads seem to have it yet there is little can be done. I did update the drivers, no blue screen but then, crap graphics too :-( Read Martyn's blog earlier, I wish I had know about it earlier, I wouldn't have had so much to read! Martyn, you had no need to feel any jealousy about GC in July, as far as I was concerened, you were there in many ways! Yes, there is nothing I would like more than if you had a nice big house I'd go stay with you and yes also, I know you know what I know and that what I want I can't have, it's OK. Just finished reading Robin's blog too, thanks honey, some nice words. I will have to be cutting down on my trips over petal, costs rising, income shrinking! I will still always be there if you need me though and you know you are a...

No, not the drug, the RAM for my PC arrived and I have noticed a speed increase. I have also had a blue screen of death again and it is from the nvidea graphics card. Checked Google and it is a well known problem, loads seem to have it yet there is little can be done. I did update the drivers, no blue screen but then, crap graphics too :-( Read Martyn's blog earlier, I wish I had know about it earlier, I wouldn't have had so much to read! Martyn, you had no need to feel any jealousy about GC in July, as far as I was concerened, you were there in many ways! Yes, there is nothing I would like more than if you had a nice big house I'd go stay with you and yes also, I know you know what I know and that what I want I can't have, it's OK. Just finished reading Robin's blog too, thanks honey, some nice words. I will have to be cutting down on my trips over petal, costs rising, income shrinking! I will still always be there if you need me though and you know you are a...

Bored, I am so bored I could crush a horse and eat a grape. Hell no, I am more bored than that, oh yes I am .... " --------------- " Plan for today: kept it simple, start the year off slow .... Get up (at some point) Make hole in wall, affix light Make two more holes in door frame, affix new bell push Step back proud of myself, have a bath, go back to sleep, relax, eat and sleep Actual day ... Zoey wakes me, "I missed the bus" I take Zoey to school picking Daisy up en route because her school still isn't open Coming back from Zoey's school Matt calls "Can you buy me breakfast down town?" I buy breakfast Cancel DIY plans Attend to email Take too long over email Start doing useful things Interrupted several times, balls up useful things Attempt to get Bluetooth working on PDA, fail, bugger up GPRS Run out of day, sort out kids arguments, make plans for tomorrow Where has this day gone ... "It's behind you"

Bored, I am so bored I could crush a horse and eat a grape. Hell no, I am more bored than that, oh yes I am .... " --------------- " Plan for today: kept it simple, start the year off slow .... Get up (at some point) Make hole in wall, affix light Make two more holes in door frame, affix new bell push Step back proud of myself, have a bath, go back to sleep, relax, eat and sleep Actual day ... Zoey wakes me, "I missed the bus" I take Zoey to school picking Daisy up en route because her school still isn't open Coming back from Zoey's school Matt calls "Can you buy me breakfast down town?" I buy breakfast Cancel DIY plans Attend to email Take too long over email Start doing useful things Interrupted several times, balls up useful things Attempt to get Bluetooth working on PDA, fail, bugger up GPRS Run out of day, sort out kids arguments, make plans for tomorrow Where has this day gone ... "It's behind you"

I got up late, I don't normally but today I did, it was good. I ate, a talked, I did stuff. I went to the pub, I drank, I chatted ... I didn't do stuff. I came home, I showered, I am clean Life can be just so complicated at times.

I got up late, I don't normally but today I did, it was good. I ate, a talked, I did stuff. I went to the pub, I drank, I chatted ... I didn't do stuff. I came home, I showered, I am clean Life can be just so complicated at times.

My general feeling of 2005 was that it was a year of high hopes not so dissimilar to a glorious river heading for a waterfall. There were beautiful things to see along the way, memories that will last me years and bring a smile to my face but, on the whole, I will remember that big drop and how deep the water was. January: The year began with me in a relationship with Nick, Jermaine was in children’s’ services respite and Nick, Matt and me were all at Ian & Richard’s place chasing after Matt trying to stop guys getting in his knickers with him very pissed filling up a biscuit tin on the way home and still dating Kim. Nick had started a new job, the year was looking good but already uncertainties were looming. I had already just about decided that my relationship would not see another year. I was aware that with Jermaine reaching 18 his respite would collapse and something else would need to replace it. I had been working hard to that end but still nothing was in place. Ian & Ri...

My general feeling of 2005 was that it was a year of high hopes not so dissimilar to a glorious river heading for a waterfall. There were beautiful things to see along the way, memories that will last me years and bring a smile to my face but, on the whole, I will remember that big drop and how deep the water was. January: The year began with me in a relationship with Nick, Jermaine was in children’s’ services respite and Nick, Matt and me were all at Ian & Richard’s place chasing after Matt trying to stop guys getting in his knickers with him very pissed filling up a biscuit tin on the way home and still dating Kim. Nick had started a new job, the year was looking good but already uncertainties were looming. I had already just about decided that my relationship would not see another year. I was aware that with Jermaine reaching 18 his respite would collapse and something else would need to replace it. I had been working hard to that end but still nothing was in place. Ian & Ri...