Went over to see Jermaine earlier.
He wasn’t in such a good mood today, told me to ‘Get out’, well, shouted at me actually. I ignored him and after half an hour managed to get a hug. I love him to bits but, at the same time, and I know this comes across as selfish, it’s really distressing seeing him like this and there is totally nothing I can do about it. I can’t communicate in any meaningful way and neither can he. As a parent, and knowing it’s not true, I still feel like I am letting him down … the joys of parenting, knowing one thing and feeling another.
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