Skip to main content

I am so ashamed of myself :-(

As mentioned in my last blog we have been getting some hassle from local chavs throwing the snowballs and stuff.

I got to a point earlier where I couldn't stay in the house any more because it was winding me up so. What I needed to do was remove myself from the situation so got John and Zoey ready and headed for the car, Daisy stayed home alone not wanting to go out in the cold.

I don't remember a great deal, it's a bit of a blur now but I know we were coming in for some abuse and had snowballs thrown at us and at some point I just snapped. The ringleader, this mixed race kid pushed me further than I thought it was possible to push me and I went for him. Initially I grabbed his throat, I just wanted to shut him up. When he smiled at me I could see the smile I got back in the old house from the kid there that terrorised us for years knowing he'd get away with it. I freaked. Very soon I let go of him totally shocked by what he had done and then, when I did, the kid (14) smiled at me, he knew he'd one a victory and I snapped again and hit him once, maybe twice. There were loads of witnesses to it and I feel so terribly ashamed. I am not ashamed because there were witnesses but because I can lose control like that. That has not happened since Jermaine was here on one of those times he was attacking everyone and I was trying to restrain him and getting really hurt. It's just so not me to be like that.

When we left and after loads of abuse and one particularly well aimed snowball to my crotch they turned their attention on the house with their boots and tried to break the door down. Daisy was justifiably terrified and had to call the police.

All I keep thinking is that here we go again, this is the start of it all over again and I love this house, I don't want to have to move again.

But those snowballs though, it was like each time a brick was going through again, all the terror of before came back, I could feel it was different and didn't know how to react, I should have just stayed indoors, turned something up really loud and tried to block it out.

Now I am in fear of what is going to happen next, I can't believe this is the end of it. I have moved the car to far away from the house and hope it's far enough, at least I can relax knowing that is not likely to be picked on. Of course, I could just be dead unlucky and some drunk will pick on it in the pub car park where it currently is. That was the only place I could park it over there where it didn't stand out, no one over there parks their cars on the road.

What the hell is wrong with people these days.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Budget Day

So, we have the ‘Let’s buy a whole host of gullible voters day’ with George Osborne. No doubt we’ll be told how employment is rising, how the deficit is falling, how we’re all so much better off now than we were (compared to what?). We’ll be told that there are still tough times ahead but that only a Conservative government can steer us through them. It will be pointed out how inflation remains low, how not raising duty on fuel has helped everyone as is seen by the current lower prices at the pumps (it’s going up again George). In short, I should listen to this budget later and decide to vote Conservative in May but, I won’t. Labour certainly did nothing to avoid the mess the country got in but they didn’t cause it. They made the mistake of trying to be too conservative, allowing high finance the freedom to cause a catastrophic cock up for which they took zero responsibility. They made the mistake of allowing Gordon Brown to take the job of Prime Minister, one for which he is totally
2 comments
Read more

Heart on my Sleeve

  If I were to get a tattoo, it'd likely be something like this True, it is unlikely I ever would get one but, if I did and here is why ... I am the guy who wears his heart on his sleeve. I am an open book, what you see is what you get and nothing complicated about it. Therein lies the problem. In this day and age and especially in the UK, genuine people are few and far between. There is so much dishonesty and deceit everywhere, especially online, that it is so difficult to trust anyone. Then, we have 'profiles' everywhere which tell the world what we want the world to think we are. These things don't allow room for individuality on any significant scale.  These things have to be filtered down so that we remain acceptable to the people around us and then we have to come across as likeable and interesting and, before long we have a fairly generic profile structure and we are loathed to be more honest in case it makes us look weak, turns us into that freak with issues, wi
Post a Comment
Read more

Christmas

A very merry Christmas wish to everyone. I would like it known, because it is not always obvious, that I do understand and accept the ‘Christ’ part of the day. I have no respect for most organised religions, they are out for power and glory of themselves, little to do with Christianity. The true meaning of Christianity is a friendship with God and Jesus and, because of that, an understanding of the right way to be to all those around us but … we don’t just need religion to understand about that, other things can lead us in the right direction too. Having just watched ‘A Christmas Carol’ I can tell you that Dickens did a lot to help us find the true meaning of the bible, the essence and what is important about the bible. That we make mankind our business, that we love people and trust people and always try to see good in others and God is an important part of ‘good’. I try to live my life according to my understanding of the teachings of Christianity. I don’t always manage it but,
Post a Comment
Read more