Skip to main content

Being a Graddad

Josh

It is very difficult to describe becoming a grandparent. In some ways, not a lot different to becoming a parent except, the pressure to prove is not there. The fear isn't there ... OK, not true. Many of the same fears are there, the health issues, cot death to name but some. What isn't there is the fear of whether I will know what to do or not, I just do and, if I am not totally right or, even, quite off the mark about it, I don't panic because I do know when to worry, and when not to.

By the time our kids have kids there is little point worrying too much whether we did a good enough job or not as parents, we already know that and it's way too late to change anything now anyway. In my case, no, I know I didn't do a good enough job. I am not sure, had I recognised when I was going wrong, I could have changed anything, I really just don't know. Should it have been obvious to me that the rosy image I had of my family was not quite so rosy? Well, yes, it should. I should have known that this ideal life they had at school with them being popular and near celebrities because of my sexuality had to be fake. I just so wanted to save myself that feeling of guilt so I brushed that aside all too often when I should have been checking. Because they felt bullied and neglected, (that neglect I cannot really accept blame for, circumstances were extremely difficult with Jermaine), they sought a better lifestyle away from the home and accepted what was on offer which led them, Matt and Daisy, down a path they ought not have taken. By the time I realised, there was little I could do but damage limitation.

Hopefully, both are now OK ... I say 'hopefully' because, like any parent, we really only know what they let on and tell us.

Daisy is an amazing mum, I know Matt will be just as amazing as a dad. Kids, never assume anything, if there are any doubts at all in your minds whether your babies are doing OK, don't stop until you know for sure.

We know Daisy is going to go through a difficult next few months dealing with yet another mess caused by James. Please, let this legal action be the last time he screws with this family and be the start of him growing up and making some sort of attempt at honesty and getting along. Matt, I know, is going to find life a total struggle with money ... son, don't borrow out of financial trouble, it always makes it worse. If it means one of you has to work more than you would like then that's what you have to do. You know you have me and Deej and Anne's family too who will support you as much as we can and, as grandparents, I am sure both sides will be more than happy to babysit.

I love being a granddad ... yes, I do get ever so annoyed, slightly flattered, but mainly annoyed, when people come up to me and tell me how lovely they are at this age and how 'I' have the difficult times to come. People, I am not the dad! Maybe I need to put the weight on again and get my hair grey or something?

Earlier, we were talking about Christmas and I was thinking what I may like for Christmas ... two grandchildren, what could be better? (If anyone says 3, I shall be very cross indeed!)

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Budget Day

So, we have the ‘Let’s buy a whole host of gullible voters day’ with George Osborne. No doubt we’ll be told how employment is rising, how the deficit is falling, how we’re all so much better off now than we were (compared to what?). We’ll be told that there are still tough times ahead but that only a Conservative government can steer us through them. It will be pointed out how inflation remains low, how not raising duty on fuel has helped everyone as is seen by the current lower prices at the pumps (it’s going up again George). In short, I should listen to this budget later and decide to vote Conservative in May but, I won’t. Labour certainly did nothing to avoid the mess the country got in but they didn’t cause it. They made the mistake of trying to be too conservative, allowing high finance the freedom to cause a catastrophic cock up for which they took zero responsibility. They made the mistake of allowing Gordon Brown to take the job of Prime Minister, one for which he is totally...
2 comments
Read more

Not a good day

Today is a very emotional one for me. I have no idea why that would be the case but apparently it is. For a day that had nothing pre-arranged this one has turned out quite busy. First, I agreed to take Matt for breakfast though I wasn't really hungry. He was being quite argumentative in the morning about some thing or other, I don't recall what exactly but some matter of politics where he was going to argue the toss whilst knowing little or nothing about it. But, even so, I was quite upbeat as Jermaine had gone to school on time ... no, scrub that, i was upbeat until I yet again had to tell Zoey to get her arse out of her room, downstairs, do her chores and get to school, that is when this day started to go downward. I spent way too much money on a new doorbell, true, we needed one but not one that cost nearly £50! This too has not helped. I went to see a garage that can fit parking sensors to my car, all well and good but they needed me to supply paint to match the circles up ...
Read more

Understanding the British

As a nation we are a funny lot. We get through the worries of life with humour. Not always good taste humour and the words 'too soon' are often mentioned! Now, this is not unique to us, many other countries adopt humour to get them through. I am going to show some ideas of humour here, don't shoot me, we're just musing this topic. Moment of silence for the people who agreed to live with shitty roommates because they "wouldn't be spending much time at home anyway" There is going to be a lot of pressure over the next few days to talk to friends and family. Fight it. Stay positive Anyway, you get the picture. Actually, most of those came from the USA. It's terribly British for one person to cough and a whole host of others stare and one person shouts, 'we're all dead now, he's got the virus'. Obviously it's not a joking matter but, without keeping our sense of the ridiculous we would go quite potty. Estimates c...
Post a Comment
Read more