Skip to main content

Anus Horiballess

Excuse my Greek!

But seriously, it ain't so good right now on the child front and I am feeling like a failure as a parent.

Not only have I in the past year had to deal with one of my kids shagging a child but also learnt that two of them smoked. Both promised not to, both lied to me. One of them, our Daisy, feels that tobacco is not enough and so has been on weed too, yesterday she was shoplifting and I am so much feeling like a complete parental failure because it's so opposite to what I have brought them up to know is the difference between right and wrong.

Matt appears to think it's OK to keep me stressed out over stuff and let things he knows bug me trundle along for weeks or months rather than just simply resolve them which is rarely more complex than a quick conversation or telephone call. This latest one is his need to arrange to have the time for our July holiday booked off work. He tried to book it weeks ago and it was declined and he's done nothing about it since. He also has a passport application sitting in his room which has sat there for a month waiting on him to complete it. He could resolve both these things simply. On one he needs to just sign it, pop it in an envelope and post it. The other he needs to speak to a manager at work and find out for sure if he can have this two weeks. If not then he needs to either cancel the holiday or look for another job.

He knew about Daisy smoking and doing drugs months ago but decided not to tell me because he wanted to remain popular with her ... he'd already said he'd given up on being able to stop her so he decided to carry on being popular and provided a cigarette to her. So, not only am I unaware of what she is doing but he is actually encouraging it ... to be popular. As if my life was not difficult enough already.

I am really not sure right now just how much energy I have got to deal with all his shite. Not that I feel life's problems would be resolved were he not involved but they would be significantly easier.

To Daisy's credit, it was her that finally told me about the drugs and smoking ... oh, did I mention the sex? Where the fuck did I go wrong?

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Budget Day

So, we have the ‘Let’s buy a whole host of gullible voters day’ with George Osborne. No doubt we’ll be told how employment is rising, how the deficit is falling, how we’re all so much better off now than we were (compared to what?). We’ll be told that there are still tough times ahead but that only a Conservative government can steer us through them. It will be pointed out how inflation remains low, how not raising duty on fuel has helped everyone as is seen by the current lower prices at the pumps (it’s going up again George). In short, I should listen to this budget later and decide to vote Conservative in May but, I won’t. Labour certainly did nothing to avoid the mess the country got in but they didn’t cause it. They made the mistake of trying to be too conservative, allowing high finance the freedom to cause a catastrophic cock up for which they took zero responsibility. They made the mistake of allowing Gordon Brown to take the job of Prime Minister, one for which he is totally...
2 comments
Read more

Cognitive Behaviour Therapy

I am currently working through modules on Self Esteem. I can honestly say, it’s tough reading! So much does relate to me it hurts to read it. Already I am wishing for answers that I need. It’s like, I know and understand what I am reading and acknowledge it as a fair representation of my current state but, where is the hug? The reassurance that it’s all going to be OK? The issue, for me, of doing this sort of thing is that it highlights possibly the greatest issue I have, I am alone. Someone special to hug up to, to talk to when I need it, well, I don’t have anyone. Perhaps that is a good thing because, right now, I’d probably question all their motives, what is their ‘real’ agenda? Even knowing where those feelings come from, where they started and so on is not yet helping me to overcome them. I’ve become somewhat insecure and full of self doubt, all negative stuff. Frustratingly, I can damn well see it too, it’s like there are two of me, am sure someone would say that’s because I a...
Post a Comment
Read more

Not a good day

Today is a very emotional one for me. I have no idea why that would be the case but apparently it is. For a day that had nothing pre-arranged this one has turned out quite busy. First, I agreed to take Matt for breakfast though I wasn't really hungry. He was being quite argumentative in the morning about some thing or other, I don't recall what exactly but some matter of politics where he was going to argue the toss whilst knowing little or nothing about it. But, even so, I was quite upbeat as Jermaine had gone to school on time ... no, scrub that, i was upbeat until I yet again had to tell Zoey to get her arse out of her room, downstairs, do her chores and get to school, that is when this day started to go downward. I spent way too much money on a new doorbell, true, we needed one but not one that cost nearly £50! This too has not helped. I went to see a garage that can fit parking sensors to my car, all well and good but they needed me to supply paint to match the circles up ...
Read more